Worst. Song. Ever.

Want me out of your house? Play Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You.”

I will go running into the street screaming, holding my hands over my ears.

It seems that a remake of “The Bodyguard” is on tap; hopefully, the offensive tune will not be included.

Some people say Houston’s rendition of the Dolly Parton song was a virtuoso turn, a ground-breaking recording that’s among the best vocal performances ever. It was described as a magnificent tour-de-force. I’d rather listen to tapes of paint being scraped from the hull of a ship.

Much has been made of the use of music as a torture device. Play “I Will Always Love You” and I’m breaking. Immediately. What do you want to know? Please just make it stop.

I decided to only include a link to the song rather than embed the video. This is so it does not accidentally begin playing while you are viewing this website. No need to thank me.

I am including Dolly Parton’s version of the song, which is very is beautiful — and X fans might like to listen to John Doe’s rendition, which is playing on the jukebox in the movie.


9 responses to “Worst. Song. Ever.

  1. Whitney Houston, we’ve got a problem.

  2. Agreed! It makes me cringe. I was maid of honor at a wedding where that was not just the first dance, but the theme of the whole affair. They have since divorced.

  3. If we ever catch Bin Laden, this would be perfect. Turn it up to 11, hit play and repeat. Must issue ear protection for the Marine guards.

  4. very bad song, but there are two others that always make me run screaming – Celebration by Kool and the Gang and Old Time Rock n Roll by Bob Seger. All my years of bartending for a caterer and hearing those two songs took their toll. Bob had some great stuff, especially Live Bullet, but Old Time was when he started to hit the skids. Maybe you could put all three on a continuous loop – Khaddaffi would give it up then as would the Wisconsin Democrats!

  5. Can’t go there with you, Eye. It’s a sappy recording and I don’t want to hear it, but if I do, all I think is “Maybe I still have a chance with Whitney.” Pretty, great smile, some heet, sings like a champ, clearly intelligent, doesn’t need money. I wish Whitney Houston were my girlfriend, girlfriend. I just hope you don’t fuck it up for me.


  6. Bonzo: Khaddaffi? Call him a relic, call him what you will. Say he’s old-fashioned, say he’s over the hill…

    Lou: Bobby Brown’s still out there. I know they’re divorced, but he’s nuts, so easy.

  7. I have the same reaction to that awful Celine Dion song from “Titanic” . . .

  8. Anything by Journey- but the ultimate hand-me-the-gun song

    The Final Countdown- I wince even typing it

  9. My sentiments exactly. All of those mentioned I hate.

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